Saturday, July 23, 2005

Apartment Hunting

So I have been looking for an apartment. Yes, I know. You all told me it was a bad idea to move back in with my former roommate. You were right. So I have looked for a few apartments. Friday I looked at...

$595 Great Location, Semi-secure building, first floor one bedroom, Quaint and cozy hideaway, New and appliances. rare vacancy.

So after looking at this apartment I have created a decoder/glossary for other apartment hunters/landlords

Great Location-Murderville

Semi-Secure-There is a lock on your door

First Floor-Easy access for murderers

One Bedroom-Studio with kinda funky, windowless sleeping closet.

Quaint-odd floorplan (walk through the bedroom/sleeping closet to get to the kitchen)

Cozy-Just a little bit bigger than my car.

Hideaway-Crime scene

New Appliances-installed some time after 1968

rare vacancy-somebody died

I decided not to apply for the Murderville Hideaway. I'm holding out for the Rapist Resort or the Shotgun Shangri la...well there is always Tacoma.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

What did you expect?

I am so sick of Seattlelites complaining about the overcast. They knew what they were getting into when they chose to live here. It's a little like going to a Cher concert and being annoyed that there are so many homosexuals. What did you expect?